10 Ways to Become a Joyful Mother

1. Put first things first. There are many things that seem important that may be taking huge amounts of time from the relationship you have with your husband and children.

2. Don't always be logical. Often logic just doesn't work when planning and dealing with a family. If we had waited for a logical time to have a baby, when there was plenty of money, an extra room, and no outside demands, life wouldn't be nearly as exciting and fulfilling as it is today.

3. Progressively nurture unconditional love. Unconditional love sounds so easy. But keeping that thought foremost in your mind when children don't follow the rules, become involved in drugs or alcohol, date someone you don't like, etc. is one of life's greatest challenges. Husbands even have their moments when you find yourself not loving some of the things they do or say. Bemoaning strange habits, bad judgment, and immaturity can obscure the unconditional love that you need to feel if you don't constantly remind yourself of its importance.

4. Laugh sooner rather than later. The fewer hours spent in misery because of a daily crisis or disaster, the better. Dece in advance, that when (not if) the next disaster happens, you're going to laugh...as soon as possible. The sooner you learn to laugh instead of cry, the happier your life will seem.

5. Have a formula for dealing with guilt. One thing that is a given in motherhood is guilt. The best solution for dealing with guilt is to tell your husband and children that you're sorry for mistakes you may have made. Advise them not to make the same mistakes. Remind yourself that there is still time to change. The process of change (sometimes known as repentance) is still a living, working principle--no matter where we are in the process of mothering.

6. Put your husband first. Having a great relationship with your husband is the most important thing you can give your children.

7. Educate yourself. One of the things that can keep your life exciting is to continue to educate yourself, even in the throes of motherhood. Make time for an art class, a parenting class, a book club, an exercise class, or a cooking class.

8. Get help! If you're overwhelmed physically, emotionally, or spiritually, think of some ways to get help. We sometimes think we are a failure if we can't handle our own lives ourselves. Remember that your time is much better spent on the things that really matter.

9. Have a passion for something and remember your dreams. Think about what you love. Remember what you have a passion for and, though there are years when that passion will be off in the distance, don't lost sight of it. If you share your dreams with your husband and children, they'll be much more likely to help you fulfill your dreams, even as you are helping them with theirs.

10. Have faith. Develop what is sometimes called "confident humility". This is knowing that without the help of a loving God in your everyday life as a mother, there is very little that you can do successfully. At the same time, know that with his help, there is really nothing that you can't do. It's a great mind-set to have on those days when you feel defeated and it seems impossible to go on.

~Linda Eyre, A Joyful Mother of Children