Tonight I am looking back over the year that we've lived in Northern Utah and what I've learned. It was about this time last year that we were living in Louisiana and Brian was offered a job with Classic Helicopters in Utah. We really struggled with the decision. On one hand we were thrilled at the prospect to returning to our home state. On the other hand we had financial concerns, mainly the pay cut that we would take. After much prayer and fasting, we decided that either course would be fine. Luckily I have moved around the country enough to know that moving back to Utah doesn't mean that everything will be perfect and all our troubles will be over. However, I didn't know just how difficult this move would actually be.
We attended a small, struggling ward in Louisiana that had many opportunities for service and growth. I became fast friends with many of the families and we supported each other. It was a great experience and I am very grateful for the experiences and fabulous friends. We decided that we would move into Brian's parent's basement apartment, which they very graciously offered to us so we could focus on Brian's student loan. They attend the same ward/church congregation that I attended while growing up. While a lot of the same people are there, new faces have also appeared. Without going into detail, it has been a very difficult transition for me and my family to attend this new ward. For whatever reason, I have not been able to make friends with anyone, nor has my daughter been able to make friends. It is like we are invisible. I am grateful for the monthly visits from my Visiting Teachers, which have been my only connection with this ward.
Now here's the part that has shocked me: I've quit going to church. I have no desire at all to be there for 3 hours every week without speaking to a single person. My daughter absolutely hates going and begs each Sunday to stay home. Eventually I started thinking that sounded like a great idea.
We are taught that everyone needs to feel that he or she is an integral part of their ward. President Hinckley counseled that every new member needs “a friend, a responsibility, and nurturing with ‘the good word of God’". I have learned that this does not exclude life-long members. A "new member" may also refer to a new ward member, whether they were baptized last week or 20 years ago.
The wards and stakes of Zion are meant to be a place of protection and support. We meet together weekly to uplift and sustain each other for the coming week. We visit members in their homes on a monthly basis to bring the Spirit by word and deed and to assess the needs of the individual and family. What has surprised me is that without that feeling of unity and belonging, those tasks went from being a happy service to a burden. I never before realized just how vital that unity was to the success of the church. In speaking about new converts, President Hinckley said, "Unless there are friendly hands and welcome hearts to greet him and lead him along the way, he may drop by the side." Although we might not be new converts, we all are converts. I have found that I have dropped "by the side" and have the new perspective of looking from the outside-in.
Let me add that I do not write this to criticize the ward members. I write this to solidify the lesson I have just realized that I have learned from this ward. It has become very clear just how important it is to fellowship every member of the ward, to make them feel accepted and needed. Even though it's 1:00 am and my thoughts are becoming less tangible by the second, I needed to put down this revelation so I won't forget. I need to apply this experience in every ward I ever attend. My mind is officially numb, and I'm going to bed....maybe I'll rewrite this so it says what I really want it to say.
We attended a small, struggling ward in Louisiana that had many opportunities for service and growth. I became fast friends with many of the families and we supported each other. It was a great experience and I am very grateful for the experiences and fabulous friends. We decided that we would move into Brian's parent's basement apartment, which they very graciously offered to us so we could focus on Brian's student loan. They attend the same ward/church congregation that I attended while growing up. While a lot of the same people are there, new faces have also appeared. Without going into detail, it has been a very difficult transition for me and my family to attend this new ward. For whatever reason, I have not been able to make friends with anyone, nor has my daughter been able to make friends. It is like we are invisible. I am grateful for the monthly visits from my Visiting Teachers, which have been my only connection with this ward.
Now here's the part that has shocked me: I've quit going to church. I have no desire at all to be there for 3 hours every week without speaking to a single person. My daughter absolutely hates going and begs each Sunday to stay home. Eventually I started thinking that sounded like a great idea.
We are taught that everyone needs to feel that he or she is an integral part of their ward. President Hinckley counseled that every new member needs “a friend, a responsibility, and nurturing with ‘the good word of God’". I have learned that this does not exclude life-long members. A "new member" may also refer to a new ward member, whether they were baptized last week or 20 years ago.
The wards and stakes of Zion are meant to be a place of protection and support. We meet together weekly to uplift and sustain each other for the coming week. We visit members in their homes on a monthly basis to bring the Spirit by word and deed and to assess the needs of the individual and family. What has surprised me is that without that feeling of unity and belonging, those tasks went from being a happy service to a burden. I never before realized just how vital that unity was to the success of the church. In speaking about new converts, President Hinckley said, "Unless there are friendly hands and welcome hearts to greet him and lead him along the way, he may drop by the side." Although we might not be new converts, we all are converts. I have found that I have dropped "by the side" and have the new perspective of looking from the outside-in.
Let me add that I do not write this to criticize the ward members. I write this to solidify the lesson I have just realized that I have learned from this ward. It has become very clear just how important it is to fellowship every member of the ward, to make them feel accepted and needed. Even though it's 1:00 am and my thoughts are becoming less tangible by the second, I needed to put down this revelation so I won't forget. I need to apply this experience in every ward I ever attend. My mind is officially numb, and I'm going to bed....maybe I'll rewrite this so it says what I really want it to say.
2 comments:
I am commenting here since I can't find the comment link on your other page... I can fix your favorite wedding picture... That's what corettadeesign does best. Just send me the best res of it you have corettadeesign@gmail.com and I can work on it to make it hot chocolate free. :)
Seriously?! You're amazing! I took a picture of the picture, so it's not the greatest. I guess the best option is to get it scanned somehow. Would it be easier to give the photo to you? Send me a message on Facebook with your ideas for the best way to do it.
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